Life must go on.

I don't know how to start but since July pasted, I felt gone. I really want to start a new life, I want to stay alone in my own world with my family. I want don't want to see anyone else. I just want to enjoy my life alone. I wish person who knew me, never know my name, my story and all about  me. I felt people are trying to be nice to me but actually they are not, they can be a good actor but they never can be a good actor to God, Allah s.w.t. I wish I can start my life from beginning but it's too late to do that, what I can do just be a new person who never care about anybody's story and problems. I want to built something magical that people surrounding me never expect that actually who I am. I can stand by my own self and I wish someday I will leave this place and I want to go somewhere that has a beautiful scenery and I can rest my mind from people that I know. I feel fool for trying to love someone that actually I already knew that couldn't get him. Why must I'm wasting all these tears on him? He loves someone and I will never know it. Someday I will make sure all the tears that I'm dealing with now will be my happy life on my future. I must start to learn how to appreciate my history because my history right now I can stand by my own self and I still can breath with a smile to move on in life. I shall start a new life, no love and I will happy forever.

Brave to Move On.

I learnt many things about life and it makes me brave, especially about love. Honestly, even it was hurt but all that was part of life of a human being. I still finding who is myself and why I still breathing in the biggest world that we all knew that there was no ending. I found the answer of why I still breathing, the answer was I still breathing because Him. He gave me everything. I stay healthy because of Him. I thank to Him everyday and I knew He never bored to hear the prayer of a His servant. I always prayers to Him to show me the guidance and the truth about love and finally, I got the answer. He answer my prayers and I knew He will because He love me. Allah s.w.t show me the truth things about him, he didn't like someone advice him about his mistakes and I still wonder why he not told me the truth about it. Why must someone told me about what you exactly you wanted to say. Why? I like person who could tell me the truth and told me directly not used anyone to tell me the truth, that was mean you're not gentleman. I felt stupid love you and before this I keep sent you a message, I didn't know why I did that. After someone told me the truth that you're actually sensitive to talk about it, I didn't know what actually I felt that could be said, mixed feeling. I felt hurt much more than you did to me before. I wasted my time cried for you but you never noticed it. What I only could say, goodluck for your future and I hope you will find someone that could understand you more than me. I reliased that he actually didn't have any future plans so, why must I waste my time for you him? I would be stupid if I wait for him. I could feel that he could not give me a beautiful future life. I tried many times to forget him but it did not work but now even it hurts I have to force myself to did it because I wanted to move on. It is the time to let him go away from my life, forever and ever. After this, there was no stalk you, I would stand by my own self and I knew this was the biggest decision that I made and I would never regret to lost you from my  life. What I only could say, Goodbye Sweetheart you changed my life and I'm getting more stronger than before. I hope you will enjoy you're life and Goodbye.............

" I'm happy to know you. I will never forget you because of you, I had amazing history life and because of you, I'm strong. Thank You Sweetheart ".